John

Note: this was previously a private entry I made back in August. I’m now making it public…

Sitting here on the floor of my apartment, writing a blog entry that I know I may never post.

My boss, CC, is running me ragged. I’ve seriously contemplated finding out where the San Antonio VA hospital is simply to go and get my prescription of Effexor XR renewed and refilled. The store has me under such a huge load of stress, that I’m not sure if I’ll be able to maintain a normal life without some kind of drug intervention. The fact that I already have to take antacid medication every morning before work is sign enough that the stress is having a physical effect on my body. Why work for a place that causes such detrimental side effects on your health? Good question.

At the time I was working in Denver at SkyWest Airlines, the price of oil was cuasing the airline such stress that when the contract between SkyWest and United Airlines was renegotiated, we lost a large amount of our labor budget. Hours went from, “overtime? sure” to “no more than 34 hours per week or you get written up”. At $17,056 per year before taxes, I simply couldn’t survive in Denver. Despite the fact that I really had grown to love that city, I was forced to seek other employement. I did in fact try to find a job for myself in the Denver region, but was unable to do so. So I called my old boss, SE, and asked if the restaurant, would take me back. They did.

So now, here I am. i’ve relocated from Denver, Co to San Antonio, TX to take the position of Restaurant manager in Schertz. This was done with the understanding that it was a temporary position only, until the store I was being hired for was made ready for me. After about a month of nights in Schertz, my store was ready. I changed to the store on the SouthEast side of town as the Acting General Manager. I had 60 days to clean up the store and prove to the district manager that I did indeed have what it took to work a store.

That was fifty-four days ago today. Now the most recent thing I heard out of my boss’s mouth is that I’m on a 90 day probation (mind you, I was actually hired on May 1st so 90 days is up already) and that she’s not seeing the results she hired me for. I’m feeling stress because I work by establishing the rules, and then applying the rules fairly yet firmly, across the board with no exceptions. Everyone knows what is expected of them and there are no surprises this way. But I’ve not been allowed to do that.

Employees have repeatedly violated the rules and done so in a deliberate manner, flaunting the fact that I am powerless to discipline them. My boss tells me, “you’ve got to find the softer-gentler side of John. You have to win these employees over so that they’ll work for you. you have to give them the win. Allow them to have some victories. If you can’t do that then no matter how good of a GM you are, you aren’t worth anything to me.” Then she tells me (not even 10 minutes later). “You’ve got to crack down on these employees and make them do their job, I don’t care if they’ve never done it before, it needs to get done in order to make this store work. I’m counting on you to make all of this happen. If you can’t get this done, then you aren’t accomplishing what I hired you for.”

Now to me, it seems grossly contradictory to “crack down” while showing a “softer gentler side”. Especially when employees simply fail to show up on July 4th, a mandatory work day for everyone in the restaurant, and I’m not allowed to fire them or even write them. Aparently it is my responsibility to tell a grown man what days he is working every single week when every else in the restaurant is expected to read their schedule. It is not his responsibility to check the schedule that was posted for the last three days he worked before heading out of town over that weekend.

That’s only one example of how my authority has been undermined at the restaurant, but it was the first public display. The next day, the other cook I had on the schedule failed to show up. How can I write him up if the day just before a different cook did the same exact thing and received no punishment? yet somehow I’m expected to maintain control and order at the restaurant. All of the responsibility, none of the authority. Not a good way to operate.

So now I’m looking at the day to day running of the store, knowing that I’m never going to be able to satisfy my boss no matter how hard I try. I really REALLY don’t want to quit, but the constant threats of losing my job put me in a situation where it would be imprudent of me NOT to be seeking a new job. If I get an offer…. I’m taking it.

The lastest? got a lead on a job opening in San Angelo at a restaurant there. It’s a bit different from what I’m doing now, more salads and cook from scratch stuff going on. But they open at 11am and close at 10pm. Which means that if you open the store you go to work at 9am and if you close the store you may be there as late as midnight (possibly a bit after that though). Much better hours than waking at 5:00am every day to get dressed, showered, coffee’d and ready to be at work at 6:45am so I can pull the drawer and get everything going at 7:00am. and definitely better than getting called at 3am because someone doesn’t like their schedule.

Please, oh please let me find a job that doesn’t cause me this constant stress. Where, if I am given responsibility for a project, I am also given the authority to ensure that is completed. Where I am allowed to use my best judgement in a situation and have my boss back me up in front of the employees and then take me to the back and chew me out. I am tired of being remonstrated in public. No one deserves that. Praise in public, reprimand in private. It works.

8/4/08 5:31 pm

not much going on right now. I need to start laundry, just don’t want to move that much. May though go to Jim’s and have some coffee.

10/10/08 21:32

Corrected a couple typos and made the post live with an update date stamp. Never did get the position in San Angelo. Now I’m working at a casual full service chain as a server while I wait for the Spring semester to start so I can go back to college and get my B.A. in Finance. more updates will follow

p.p.s.- Ok mom, that’s like three posts in one day. Now leave me alone about the blog for a week